Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Just some thoughts...

Somehow I knew when I woke up today that I'd be writing another blog tonight. It was one of those ideas that was in my head when I woke up this morning. What I'm going to blog about is still a mystery to me.
It seems like I usually approach my blog when I'm in a terribly reflective mood. Don't ask my why I'm in that mood today, it's just something that happens naturally I suppose. I can't recall exactly anything special that has happened today that would cause me to be so. Hmm...
Life for me has finally taken a different direction, and after much stressing, I'm finally in a different situation of life as well. I'm now sitting on my bed in my new apartment in Provo, an hour away from home. I've started at another branch of America F
irst and I'm working as a teller again, although I still do a bit of loan stuff when needed. That's all I can really say to bring you up to date. Nothing especially spectacular seems to be going on right now. Perhaps it's because we're in the winter months, and everything starts to slow down, unlike the eventful months of summer. *shrugs* I dunno.
Now that I'm thinking about it, I think I've realized why I've felt so
reflective lately. It IS because it's the winter months! I'm coming up on the last couple weeks of the year, and now I'm
looking back across this year and thinking about the things that I've done. The more I think about it, it feels like I've done a ton. If I just sit here and let my mind wander across it, I go to all sorts of memories. The thing is, it's not necessarily to events, at least, not just one at a time. It really just hops to different faces of people I've met or interacted with this year, and my experiences with them. Each one sort of has it's own twist to it.
Am I making any sense here? I feel like I'm sort of just rambling on, but you know, it feels good just to write what pops into my head.
So as these faces pop around in there, has it's sort of tale that tells the story of my year. I wonder if I skim over it some of you may catch on to what or who I'm talking about. That's sort of dangerous in itself. Although, my oldest brother dislikes it very much if I start getting vague, but then again, I'm not quite sure if he reads this blog or not. In fact, I have no idea if anyone still reads this blog at all. It's sort of thought provoking as I continue to write in here from time to time.
I suppose if I were to skim vaguely across my past year, I'd come to all sorts of names. It's just something interesting to ponder about. As they say, my life has been molded this year by the people I've met. Some good molds, some not. I've reached some amazing highs this years, yet there was some deep lows as well. "Opposition in all things" I suppose. There were several moments throughout this whole year when I thought my life was content, others when I thought I'd never be happier. On the other end, there were times this year when I've felt terribly sad, some when I felt my heart was broken, and some when I just found myself crying. I feel proud for the things I have accomplished, yet there are also several things I really regret about this year. Life is a roller coaster, no doubt. I seem to be recognizing that more and more in these last couple years. It must be that transition into adult life that I am beginning to feel more and more as time goes on.
I just hope now that I can see how things have gone this last year, I can look to the next, and see what improvements I can make. I feel better prepared looking into 2011 unlike how I was going into 2010. Let's just hope I can make this year a better one.

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